[The wait of that hurt is too much. He's floored by how much has changed - how much hadn't - how much Alan thought that - that being Allison could have changed things. There's a small part of him that just wants to run, that doesn't want to explain that it wouldn't have mattered. He doesn't want to take away that hope. It feels like putting out a light. He doesn't - ever - want to put out a light for her - him.
Scott looks down at the clothes in his hand. He could be fast enough to just go, but he knows before he even thinks it that he's not just going to bail. That's not what he does.
His eyes dart to Allison's bed, and for a second, he thinks maybe they should sit down. But he's not sure that closeness right now is a good idea, either. Scott didn't realize - the only good thing I've ever had. Was that how Allison felt, too? His hair falls forward, and he pushes it back, tucks it behind his ears and breathes.]
It wasn't that different. Your mom still tried to kill me. She, um. Found out we were sleeping together.
[It's not as awkward to say as he thought it might be - though it still sounds ludicrous - so he pushes on.]
When we weren't supposed to be seeing each other, I mean. And Matt...Matt was stalking Allison.
[He's separating them in his head, making them four separate people. He can't tell someone with this much weight on them that their memories aren't real.
There's some emotion in his voice when Matt comes up, though it's not easy to describe. He was angry, but he never really hated Matt. What would he have done, if he'd had no one? And Matt really had been alone. He tries not to think about what might have happened, and shakes his head, only vaguely annoyed as the hair comes out from behind his ear again.]
Most of it happened that way. Allison did change the code, but not right away. It was - her mom had just died. Nobody can take on that kind of weight, after something like that.
[They had been young with no weight to carry, but he remembers how hard it was on Stiles. He remembers how impossible it had been, how all he could do was be there. Allison hadn't let him, and he couldn't blame her. He hadn't even been able to tell her why her mother had died.
Deciding to follow his instincts, even if the physicality of it all feels wrong, Scott sets aside his clothes and moves to hug Alan again, arms wrapping around under neath Alan's shoulders instead of above them.]
You are strong, dude. I can already tell that. [Because Allison was. He closes his eyes briefly.] I know you did everything you could. For everyone. [He's ignoring the way his voice goes tight.]
AWKWARD EX SPAM
Scott looks down at the clothes in his hand. He could be fast enough to just go, but he knows before he even thinks it that he's not just going to bail. That's not what he does.
His eyes dart to Allison's bed, and for a second, he thinks maybe they should sit down. But he's not sure that closeness right now is a good idea, either. Scott didn't realize - the only good thing I've ever had. Was that how Allison felt, too? His hair falls forward, and he pushes it back, tucks it behind his ears and breathes.]
It wasn't that different. Your mom still tried to kill me. She, um. Found out we were sleeping together.
[It's not as awkward to say as he thought it might be - though it still sounds ludicrous - so he pushes on.]
When we weren't supposed to be seeing each other, I mean. And Matt...Matt was stalking Allison.
[He's separating them in his head, making them four separate people. He can't tell someone with this much weight on them that their memories aren't real.
There's some emotion in his voice when Matt comes up, though it's not easy to describe. He was angry, but he never really hated Matt. What would he have done, if he'd had no one? And Matt really had been alone. He tries not to think about what might have happened, and shakes his head, only vaguely annoyed as the hair comes out from behind his ear again.]
Most of it happened that way. Allison did change the code, but not right away. It was - her mom had just died. Nobody can take on that kind of weight, after something like that.
[They had been young with no weight to carry, but he remembers how hard it was on Stiles. He remembers how impossible it had been, how all he could do was be there. Allison hadn't let him, and he couldn't blame her. He hadn't even been able to tell her why her mother had died.
Deciding to follow his instincts, even if the physicality of it all feels wrong, Scott sets aside his clothes and moves to hug Alan again, arms wrapping around under neath Alan's shoulders instead of above them.]
You are strong, dude. I can already tell that. [Because Allison was. He closes his eyes briefly.] I know you did everything you could. For everyone. [He's ignoring the way his voice goes tight.]