"So...remind me how you know Crocker again?"

"Nathan..."

"It's an honest question!"

Allison has to cover her mouth to keep from giggling as Nathan Wuornos and Audrey Parker lead her into the Gray Gull, still trying to pump her for answers. Her first stop was the bed & breakfast, and after unpacking a few things she finally got Duchess and Brownie together to take a walk. Spotting Nathan hadn't been hard, based on Duke's descriptions of him ("good looking fella...but he's not really that tall, that's just the giant pole up his ass") and of Audrey (cute, sweet...super hot...still trying to figure out what she sees in Wuornos."), who was right beside him when Allison asked for directions to the bar.

"Whoah, you might wanna tie the dog up outside, Miss Argent."

Allison rolls her eyes at Nathan with a grin. "Relax, he's gonna want to see this little girl right here." At least, as long as he remembers her...and Allison, for that matter.

Truthfully, she's still not sure how this world hopping stuff works, or what happens to those that leave the Barge against their will.

She distracts herself by glancing around, with no sign of the big lummox anywhere.

"Could he be on the boat?" she asks, glancing at Audrey.

"No, I texted him." Audrey replies slowly, scanning the room. "He said he was here--don't worry, I didn't say anything about you...kitchen, maybe?..."

[Backdated to the 19th; day after the event]

[VIDEO;PUBLIC]

[The entire port had been...strange. One minute, she'd been walking Brownie with Duchess in her usual spot: stashed in her bunny purse, and the next? Some kind of alien ComiCon. It was a nice break from the Barge, no two ways about it, even if she didn't have any money...more surreal than anything.

When the Admiral finally brought them all back to the ship, she had a convention bag full of some interesting complimentary swag, far too many random facts about comic book superheroes jumbled together in her head, and a burning need for a nice, relaxing shower.

She slept in her own cabin, just for the night...twelve hours straight, with Brownie tucked against her back and Duchess snuggled against her belly...and only when she woke up did she go to check on Duke...

When the feed clicks to life, it's there: right in front of Duke's cabin.

Only, it's not recognizable as his cabin. It's a plain door, the kind belonging to every other unoccupied cabin on the Barge.

And Allison...her eyes are dry, and she's perfectly calm. Too calm.]

It looks like Duke's gone.

[She purses her lips for a moment, swallows hard...then kills the feed.]

[SPAM - open]

[Allison doesn't seek out her pack, not this time. She doesn't go looking for comfort or commiseration, because they weren't close to Duke the way she was. It's nothing as self-pitying as them not understanding, or her needing to wail and beat her chest in grief...

She's raw, and in pain, and feels a quiet lack of control that frightens her.

So she seeks out solitude, and she looks for it in comforting places. When she's hungry, she heads for the dining hall to eat. When she's tired, she heads to her cabin on Level Two to sleep. She walks Brownie on deck, and in the Enclosure so she, Brownie, and Duchess can curl up in the middle of the Beacon Hills Preserve and just breathe in the soothing scents of the outdoors, of home.

Inevitably, however, she leaves the animals in her cabin and seeks out both the gym and the pub, the places that meant something to Duke, to her, and to both of them. If she runs into anyone, she doesn't avoid them...she tries, however, to find sanctuary when her refuges are the least populated.

She wants quiet. She craves stillness.

She's...grieving, and she feels very much like she's grieving alone. Until she figures out how to deal with it...she wants to try and keep it that way.]

[SPAM]

[When Allison wakes up, she's on her stomach, which isn't the way she usually sleeps. She sleeps on her back so Duchess can curl up on her chest if she wants to.

The second she tries to roll over, she's met with blinding pain.

It takes some doing, but she manages to get out of bed (and dislodge Duchess from the little nest she's made beneath one of the new appendages on Allison's back) and get a look at the massive, brilliant white wings that have not only sprouted on her back, but shredded her t-shirt.

It takes everything she's got not to panic. She doesn't move for a solid hour as she figures out where the new muscles are, how to get them to respond to what she wants them to do. She breaks her bedside lamp in the process, and whacks the wall a couple of painful times, but after a while of spreading and contracting, a couple of hesitant flaps, and getting used to the feel of what she perceives to be two new limbs, she finally settles into the task of being able to leave her cabin.

For the moment, a shower is out of the question, but thankfully she took one before bed. Jeans are fine, but none of her shirts will work. She finally tracks down a purple string bikini top, and with a little work secures the lower half just beneath the root of her wings. It's a little uncomfortable, but for the moment it's functional enough that she can eat in the dining hall, be seen in various corridors as she heads out to check on her pack, and later spend some time on deck and in the Enclosure as she tests the limits of her wings for the first time.]

[VIDEO - PUBLIC]

[Later in the day, the feed clicks on. Allison's features are against a gleaming white backdrop of soft, fluffy feathers as she restlessly stretches her wings.]

Okay...so who else woke up looking like something out of a comic book?

[When the feed clicks on, Allison is visibly upset. She's also not in her cabin, as evidenced by her surroundings. Her eyes and nose are red: she's been crying, and recently, but she's deadly calm as she speaks.

She has to be, or else she's going to hurt someone. The feed isn't totally steady, because her hand is shaking, and in a rare occurrence, Duchess is nowhere to be seen.]

Isaac's in a coma.

[And this is the part of her new condition she wasn't prepared for, this wild fury and soul-deep grief all mixed up and so intense her free hand is just out of sight, balled into a fist, claws digging into her own palm so the pain will keep her from shifting. She's been like this since she found him over an hour ago, since she picked him up off the floor of his room and put him into bed...

Since the tears and pleading for him to wake up turned to animal snarls she couldn't control, and she glimpsed her transformed face in the mirror for the first time.

She's human now as her eyes well up again, but there's something clearly animal in the way she bares her teeth as she speaks.]

Anyone that comes near his cabin without my permission is getting their throat torn out.

[She can feel the beast rising, she doesn't dare risk more...abruptly, the feed goes dead to all but those on her private filters.]

[Extended Pack Filter]

That goes for you guys, too...just knock first, okay? I'm in Isaac's cabin, and I just...

[She trails off, her eyes flashing gold. Her jaw tenses, and fangs are visible just past her lips, her features shifting as she fights the rising change.]

I need some time to...calm down.

((dated post-kid!flood))

[VIDEO;public]

[It's late in the morning when Allison finally clicks on her feed. She's dressed, made up, put together. She still manages to look fragile and pale...

And she's packed.

There's a small duffel beside her, she's got her jacket on, and Duchess's things are packed up beside her, including Duchess herself nestled in the dog bunny purse she procured for her in Amsterdam. She's sitting on her couch, she's rubbing her hands together, and her comm is propped up on the coffee table as she offers a wan smile.]

Hi. Me, all grown up again. That was...not as weird as being a guy, or Robin Hood. Or even a werewolf.

...anyway. I know what you're all thinking about me and the bags and stuff...look what happened the last time I left. This time, it's real. I'll be in my cabin another hour, I'll leave the comm open...then I'm gone. I need the time away, more than I ever did.

[She hesitates, lowering her gaze as her eyes glass over.]

Before I explain...I owe a lot of people a lot of apologies. Too many to name...I became a vampire, and I'm not going to allow myself to be excused for the things I did and the people I hurt. I want--I need you all to know how sorry I am for the thing I became.

And because I'm leaving right after this...because I can get some distance...I'm going to explain exactly why everything went down that way.

( CW: allusions to violence, bitey vampire behavior, blood/gore, and Jerry Being An Evil Creep )

[She reaches up to brush a few silent tears from her face. She still can't look directly into the feed...until she takes a breath and finally lifts her head.]

The day I became human again, I killed him...and I saw the thing that will help me get my revenge. For me, for my friends...for everyone he's hurt.

Including himself. Because I saw him for a minute when he died, I saw his human face. Maybe even the man that spent a month aboard this ship, that left us the knowledge we needed to kill a vampire. This is my revenge: exposing him.

Somewhere in there, Jerry Dandridge is still human. I don't believe we can ever save him, I don't think we can ever completely trust him...but he can be helped. This is not altruism, this is revenge I'm talking about. And, maybe on a smaller scale, respect for the human that some of us weren't fortunate enough to get to know.

[She lowers her gaze again, only this time she's lifting a single wooden stake into the feed, one of the bunch that the mirror version of Jerry left for her.]

The Jerry Dandridge that may not be on board this ship anymore...but is still one of the best wardens we ever had. At least I think so.

So, while I'm taking a break...because I will be back...I'm the one saying this, so take it to heart.

Don't hurt Jerry. Don't let your guard down if he's not in Zero...and remember that living well is the best revenge.

Work on the problem while I'm away...let's all make sure that Jerry doesn't leave this ship until he's living well. Then we can all have our revenge.

[Setting Duchess back in her bag, ready to drop off with Duke before she leaves, she sends a few private messages before she lets the comm stay on for one more hour before it goes dead...and Allison is gone.]

( [PRIVATE; Tig and Duke] )

( [PRIVATE; Lydia, Scott, Stiles, Kira, Isaac] )

[VIDEO; public]

[When the feed kicks in, Allison is in the corridor, clearly in the middle of walking. Duchess is on her shoulder, per the usual, but she's getting big enough that Allison has to keep her steady with one hand because she's afraid of the little rabbit falling off. She spent the night in Tig's cabin (and the night before in Duke's, she still can't face her own cabin at night by herself), so she's not looking as raw as she has been lately.

In fact...she actually looks like something resembling normal, if a little sedate.]

So, I just went out on deck...and I think we're in Europe. I only took a peek, but...yeah. My home planet and everything. [She pauses, allowing her to reach into her pocket for a few bills, which she brandishes at the camera.]

The cash the Admiral left is also a clue. Euros.

[Pocketing her money again, her hand returns to Duchess to steady her as she continues walking.]

Anyway, I have some shopping to do, but the rest of my time is totally free. Lydia, you're coming, the stuff on this list that the Admiral gave me versus cash in hand means we can do a little bit of shopping instead of just shopping. Duke? You can help me shop. Unless you wanna shop, I still owe you for the Devil Juice I stole from you.

Anyone that wants to hang can buzz me. After the last four weeks, all bets are off. I have one serious plan for this port: fun.

[Private to Tig Trager]

My stuff is everywhere, so I'm running around collecting Duchess's things, mostly...meet me in my cabin in twenty minutes if you want to go ashore. Give me five minutes to be warden-ly, and I'll make it worth your while.

[Private to Isaac Lahey]

We're spending at least three quarters of this trip together. No less than half. I don't care if we're just standing on a bridge somewhere, staring at the water, we're doing this.

[PORT SPAM]

[Allison's first day in Amsterdam consists of wandering, for the most part. She rents herself a bike, does a little shopping, and pokes her head into various corners to get a lay of the land. She also makes the decision not to stay aboard ship during the port, and with a little extra cash pilfered from the strongbox in the study, she gets herself a bed at a local hostel in Vondelpark for the next four days. It's noisy and jostling, but it's clean and bright and the park is perfect scenery.

She realizes quickly that the second day is a full moon, so she knows she probably won't see the boys from home. She sends messages to Lydia, Duke, Stiles, Kira, and Tig with invitations to shop and/or eat. That night, she doesn't return to the hostel...she spends it in Vondelpark proper, stretched out on the grass, watching the night sky...and listening.

She doesn't know where the boys are, exactly...it's been a long time since any of them have seen a full moon, for the most part...but she hopes for the sound of a wolf's distant howl to put her at ease.

On her third day and fourth day, along with wrapping up some shopping for the list the Admiral provided, Allison sets aside some time for museums. Most of her friends will receive a text invitation, and those that join her will be dragged to at least one art museum, maybe two. Among her plans, however, those that join her will visit the Rembrant House and the Museum of Bags & Purses. Later on, however, when she's alone very late on either the third or fourth day, she sends a text message to Isaac for a potential trip to the SexMuseum.]

[Three days ago, the Admiral had issued his edict: Allison, as a warden, had a permanent inmate. She has his file, she has responsibility for his welfare...

...and it's Tig. She doesn't understand, she's troubled...but once upon a time, she'd have been horrified. In the arena, however, he pledged his loyalty to Allison, and thus far he's held to it. Tig Trager is a member of the pack now, no matter how deeply he disturbs her with the intensity of his...attention.

She reads the file to understand...but it's not the man she knows. She takes a couple of days going over all of it, realizing early on that it's not the file of the man she knows. It's this ship's Tig Trager. She reads the history of a troubled man, but different in ways she's never seen in the man who seems obsessed in the possibility that she might yet graduate through a reversion to feral behavior.

The man in those pages is loyal, has a code of honor...he's depraved, vulgar, and violent, but he's not a civilian. She knows a little about her version of Trager, but not enough to judge.

Still...if he's anything like the people she's known, if some measure of this does live in her Tig Trager...

It drives Allison to start writing a letter for her counterpart, one that swiftly turns into a journal, filling a notebook she found in the office that's part of her cabin. She writes about her impressions, her thoughts on the Barge...her own life, and her version of Tig. She hopes it will help, hopes it will give her insight into the darker aspects of the man.

When she finishes jotting down her thoughts for the morning, Allison decides the time has come...and reaches for her comm.]

[VIDEO;Private to Tig Trager]

You, me...pub, twenty minutes? [It's a command spoken like a question, gentled with the promise of choice.] Being a warden, I have access...just promise me you won't overdo it right away? I do want to talk to you...I have something you should see.

[SPAM]

[After she's connected with Tig, later in the day Allison traverses the ship, checking her territory. It's compulsive, but she visits the people she's close to, friendly with...and those from her own ship who may not want to see her, but she's sworn to look after, to save, all the same. Out of respect for her counterpart, she also stops in to look after Duke, who was so important to her double that she moved herself into his cabin.

Satisfied he's still alive, Allison works a shift in the dining hall as well, helping out Riddick where she's needed before she takes Brownie the dog to the CES for a run, then heads back to her cabin to make sure that Johnny and Duchess are well exercised. Visitors are welcome to find her there, letting bunnies hop around the room and watching as Brownie supervises, either gently herding them away from trouble or occasionally picking them up in her mouth like puppies (with careful supervision from Allison), and keeping them in a carefully contained area in the living room.]

[The video feed that comes on reveals a brief, shaky shot of Duke Crocker's unconscious features. A familiar ball of grey and white fluff is beside his head, which is in Allison's lap...revealed when she finally gets her hands to stop shaking and realizes she has the comm switched on and flips it up to face her instead. To those familiar with the place, it's clear she's crouched behind the bar in the pub.

Her own face is contorted, eyes red and glassy, mouth barely keeping a straight line.]

Duke's...in a coma. I brought my rabbit down to introduce them, and I found Duke--

[Her voice cracks on his name and her features crumble for a moment. Her hand lifts to cover her mouth to stifle tears as she wills herself not to cry. It takes a minute, but she manages to compose herself...barely.]

I can't...I need help. To move him, to his room. [She knows nothing can be done. She knows this happens...she still feels a huge sense of loss and a growing sense of panic, seeing her Duke so still and lifeless.]

I, uh...anyone that's friends with him, I'll look after Brownie so don't worry. I have access to his cabin, I can let in anyone who wants to see him. [She sniffs and wipes at her eyes, something in her face hardening.] And I know...there's a tradition or something, I know people in comas get drawn on?

Not this time...if I find a mark on him? I'll put an arrow in the ass of whoever's responsible.

( [Barge Pack Filter] )

[With that, Allison cuts the feed, then gently gathers Duke further into her lap, wrapping her arms around both him and Duchess the bunny, silent tears sliding from her eyes to fall on his hair and forehead as she clings to him.]